My Parents

by withlovecarlacompleto

Some of these will be hard for me to write so bare with me…

Let me talk about my Dad first ❤

My daddy…My daddy is the best dad well I think he is the best in my perspective not only is he a dad but he can be my friend and my mentor.  When I need someone to talk to he’s all ears, whatever the occasion is he’s there. Sometimes I may not like what he says but I listen (sometimes). We have father and daughter dates 🙂 (Which I think everyone should have with their father) He always sticks up for me, when no one believes me, he is there 100% I’m really blessed to have him as a dad. We have inside jokes that we share.  He always calls me his baby girl even though I’m 21. He gives me my freedom, tells me that just as long as I know what is right and what is wrong and that I have my limitation everything is good. But here’s the sad part, my dad always says he’s getting old well I mean everyone gets old but if you look at my dad…he doesn’t look old at all I swear hehe. My dad has prostate cancer 😦 I mean it’s a slow progress but the fact that he has cancer scares me 😦 bc I’ve already lost people. Anyways, no matter how old I am I will always be his baby girl 🙂

My mother…Hmmmm

Well my mother…My mom is a 360 degrees completely different from my dad. She is very I don’t know how to explain it because I myself can’t figure her out on my own. She’s very controlling and she worries LIKE A LOT! I love her also. But sometimes it seems like she pushes me to my limit, sometimes I feel like she’s pushing me away. She always underestimate me. It seems like she DOESN’T TRUST ME 😦 Sometimes I seem to think that I’m such a horrible kid.  But then I know I’m not. I’m a good girl. Ask my friends the ones that knows me, they’ll tell you I’m a good kid. I’ve never done drugs. I’ve never smoked in my life! I swear on my grandpa’s grave! I’ve never tried MJ or gotten high! I mean sure people’s done it but it doesn’t mean they are bad they just took the wrong path. And I’m 21 and I’m not pregnant!  But sometimes she listens to what her friends say MOST of the time and she thinks I’m just like her friends kids, who will run off and get knocked up. My mom is complicated to figure out. From the thing I know about her is her favorite word is NO, NO THIS, NO THAT! I mean I know Asian parents are strict but I have Asian friends and there parents are not like that. But I don’t know why she’s like that. I find it super sad that she doesn’t trust me. What’s the worst thing I’ve ever done? I mean if she can give me one legit reason why she doesn’t trust me then sure, you know. She probably will never know it but I get the feeling sometimes she’s just…well actually I don’t want to say the word cuz it’s quite hurtful. I can never go to her for advice or Idk for anything, because I’ve learned the hard way.  I try to be a strong girl, really I do. I mean she works really hard and I appreciate that. She buys me this and that, but I’m not into those materialistic girls. I don’t what I’ve done to make her feel this way about me. It’s not like it’s now it’s happened all throughout the year. But she’s still my mom…

My Nanay which means mother also 🙂

(people are going to wonder why I have 2 moms, actually I have 4 parents, why? BC I’m blessed…it’s a complicated story but lets leave that out)

My Nanay…She’s the most wonderful and loving and caring person ever! I miss her dearly! I cry every time I talk about her because I just think of the days that I spent with her. I miss her hugs, her smile, her laughing and most of all I just miss her! She passed away last year, 7 days after my birthday. I spent every moment with her or at least I tried since I had school. My Nanay, I miss how I can tell her anything to everything. To my friends, to my crushes and to anything.  She’s quite interested when I tell her about those stuff. She always laugh about my crazy stories with my friends.  She knew about my best friends. Whenever my mom and I don’t get along I always vent out to her and I try really hard not to cry in front of her.  I miss cuddling with her because she always strokes my hair and scratches my back until I fall asleep. I remember when I was young she would bring me to school and fetch me whenever she visit California. We always walked from my school and from home. She’s so understanding and she’s never judgmental towards me. She hardly ever gets mad. My dad says I’m just like her, I’m very patient, understanding and I always listen and try to understand things.  I guess I’m like her in some ways because I know my Nanay never really told her siblings or anyone what bothered her and I guess I’m like that too. I don’t think I’ve ever told anyone about my feelings because if I do I’d just start crying. I mean sure I’ve probably told everyone because I’m writing this, but in a way it’s good because I just let something so heavy out of my chest. If i could have one wish I’d wish for her to just see her or feel her warmth touch. Rest in paradise ❤

My Tatay…Hmmm

My Tatay…Well I know that he wasn’t the best father but after my nanay passed away, I knew he tried to regain what he had lost. I mean at least he tried. Even though all those times on what he did. I forgive him. Everything was so sudden when he passed away, it was so unexpected.  Death is very unexpected and so is life. I miss both of them, my nanay and tatay ❤

So that’s that…my parents 🙂